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> On My Way to the Holiday Inn
On My Way to the Holiday Inn
I just heard on CNN that the average cost for a Nursing Home per day in the USA is $188!
Now, I figure it this way, I can get a real nice room at the Holiday Inn for around $65. That leaves $123 for food (room service), laundry, Elvis collectibles, gratuities, and clothes. They have a swimming pool, some even have a workout room (therapy), a lounge, cable (recreation), washer dryer (if I am too impaired, a child or grandchild can pick up my clothes once a week, or they could rotate, that way everyone would only have to do it twice a year). Most have free toothpaste and razors, but all have free shampoo and soap.
There may be a bit of a wait to get that first floor room, but that's all right, it takes months to get into some Nursing Homes. There is the Senior bus, the Handicap bus, a Church bus or van, cabs, alert cabs, and in some cities The Duck! You have security and if someone sees you drop over, I am sure they would call an ambulance (if you break your hip, hopefully the family would be smart enough to sue). What more could you ask for? With AARP and other Senior discounts, I could be liven pretty dern nicely.
So, when I reach that Golden age help me keep my grin, just check my ole rickety self into the nearest Holiday Inn!
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Last updated 2004-04-11