Jokes Archive >
Ponderables & Lists
> Questions to Ponder
Questions to Ponder
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in" but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
Why are you IN a movie, but you are ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
How come we choose from just two people for president and fifty for Miss America?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?
If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
Is it illegal to run into a crowded fire and yell, "Theater?"
How does a shelf salesman keep his store from looking empty?
Does a blind tourist use a sightseeing eye dog?
Is it possible that "Memorex" is the name of an all-mime band and those tapes aren't blank after all?
Is there another word for "synonym"?
Could someone ever get addicted to counseling? If so, how could you treat them?
Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters wearing sheets aren't going as ghosts but as mattresses?
How do you let someone know you've just painted a wet paint sign?
Why did they make the word "dyslexia" so hard to read?
When two funeral processions meet at an intersection, how do they decide who has the right of way?
If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights off?
Do police sketch artists start out as those guys who outline dead bodies?
Why don't they just make food stamps edible?
To compliment the vest, why not some nice bullet-proof slacks?
Should crematoriums give discounts for burn victims?
Is an empty beanbag chair still a chair, or just a giant beanbag?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would they still grow, only to be troubled and insecure?
Isn't is it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?
Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?
Why isn't there a mouse-flavored cat food?
Why do they report power outages on TV?
What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant?
Is it possible to be totally partial?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?
If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?
When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?
When companies ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
If someone has a mid-life crisis while playing hide and seek, does he automatically lose because he can't find himself?
If a person thinks marathons are superior to sprints, is that considered racism?
If a case of the clap spreads, is it then considered a case of the applause?
How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
Could it be that so many deer get hit on the intestates because they're simply obeying the posted deer crossing signs?
Did the early settlers ever go an camping trips?
Okay, so sticks and stones may break your bones but names can never hurt you. What if someone carved a name in a stone and then threw it at you?
And whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it?
Wouldn't it be smarter to label "top secret" documents something less conspicuous like "trivial information which would only bore you to tears"?
If a farmer forgets to shut one of his barn doors, should you tell him his zipper's open?
What does it mean if you break a mirror with a rabbit's foot?
How many people thought of the Post-it note before it was invented but just didn't have anything to jot it down on?
When vultures are on their deathbed, are they ever tempted to eat themselves?
If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter?
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
When a cow laughs does milk come up its nose?
How did a fool and his money get together?
If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
What's another word for thesaurus?
Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injection?
Why is abbreviation such a long word?
Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
When you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
Do blind Eskimos have seeing eye sled dogs?
Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container?
What do they use to ship styrofoam?
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
(Share this joke with a friend!)
The jokes posted in this site were not composed by myself and I claim no copyright for them.
This page and it's content, except where otherwise noted, are copyright ©2004 by Jim Watts.
Last updated 2004-04-11