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The Bible in Kids' Eyes
The following are children's answers to Sunday school questions in a Church of England, as they were reprinted by St. Paul's (Episcopal) Church in Seattle, Washington:
Noah's wife was called Joan of Ark."
"Henry VIII thought so much of Wolsey that he made him a cardigan."
"The fifth commandment is: Humor thy father and mother."
"Lot's wife was a pillar of salt by day but a ball of fire at night."
"When Mary heard she was to be the mother of Jesus, she went off and sang the Magna Carta."
"Salome was a woman who danced naked in front of Harrod's (a London department store)."
"Holy acrimony is another name for marriage."
"Christians can have only one wife. This is called monotony."
"The Pope lives in a vacuum."
"Paraffin is next in order after seraphim."
"Today, wild beasts are confined to the Theological Gardens."
"The patron saint of travelers is St. Francis of the seasick."
"Iran is the Bible of the Muslims."
"A Republican is a sinner mentioned in the Bible."
"Abraham begat Isaac and Isaac begat Jacob and Jacob begat twelve partridges."
"The natives of Macedonia did not believe, so Paul got stoned."
"The First Commandment: Eve told Adam to eat the apple."
"It is sometimes difficult to hear what is being said in church because the agnostics are so terrible."
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Last updated 2004-04-11